Confessions of a New Mum - As Time Passes | Motherhood | Kylie Purtell - Capturing Life

Thursday, 15 November 2012

Confessions of a New Mum - As Time Passes | Motherhood


This post was originally published in October on the amazing Zanni's blog, Heart Mama. I decided to re-post it here today as it's truer now than it was just a short month ago. With Mia on the verge of turning 1 I am oh-so aware of how fast this year has gone, and I've been doing a lot of reflecting on those first early months of being a brand-new Mum.

The first few months of Punky’s life seem a bit of a blur now, looking back 11 months after the fact. As any new Mum can attest, nothing can quite prepare you for the rollercoaster of emotions and worry that you’ll suddenly find yourself on in those first few days, weeks and months.

While I was incredibly in love with baby girl I was also incredibly scared of her. Well, not of her, scared for her, I guess you could say. Being the oldest of 5, and having friends with babies, I had a slight idea of what to do when it came to the basics of looking after a baby.

Regardless, I still second-guessed everything I was doing.
I had doubts, lots of doubts, about the best way to care for this helpless little creature, about the right and wrong way to do things. Doubts about breastfeeding, doubts about sleeping, doubts about friends and relatives holding my baby for too long. I even had doubts about my doubts.

Being a bit of a control freak, and liking to know exactly what I am doing, I searched everywhere for answers. In books. Online. From my Mum, family, and friends. I don’t have to tell you that everyone has an opinion on the best way to do things with a baby. The internet is a murky pit of contradictions and conflicting advice, and at 2 in the morning, when your baby is screaming and won’t feed properly, and you feel like your world is going to end, reading all of that advice only makes things seem that much worse.

If there is one thing I have learned in the last 11 months since becoming a Mum, it’s to trust my instincts. To do what works for Punky and myself, and not worry about what everyone else in the world is doing or thinks. I’ve learned not to worry about spoiling her, or setting up bad habits. If I could have that time with Punky again I wouldn’t bother looking on the internet for different ways to get a baby to sleep, or to check if she should really be feeding every hour. Now that I know how quickly those first few months would go, I’d just concentrate on soaking up every moment with my tiny, newborn baby. I’d cuddle her and hold her as much as I want, feed her whenever she wants, lie down and have a nap together on the bed.

I hope I can remember this when it comes time to have a second baby. I hope I remember that the newborn stage is exactly that, a stage, one that passes all too quickly, and that, despite the sleepless nights and worries about feeding and everything else, this stage will pass in a heartbeat. I hope I remember to trust my instincts, to not worry about what everyone else thinks is the right thing to do, and to do what’s best for myself and my baby. Because as long as there’s love, it will always work out in the end.

I am still looking for guest bloggers to write their confessions on being a new Mum (and it's not restricted to first time Mum's you can write about being a new mum to a second, third or more babies) for 2013 onwards. If you are at all interested I would love to hear from you. Please email me at kylie(@)kyliepurtell.com

Previous Confessions...
Confessions of a New Mum Part One - Learning Curves and 'Un'Enjoyment
Confessions of a New Mum Part Two - Stitched Up
Confessions of a New Mum Part Three - The Part-time SAHM
Confessions of a New Mum Part Four - Mum Appreciation
Confessions of a New Mum Part Five - Losing My Confidence
Confessions of a New Mum - Kelly from Handmade Tears and Triumphs (Guest Post)
Confessions of a New Mum - Bron from Big Brother, Little Sister & the Baby (Guest Post)
Confessions of a New Mum - Jenn from Mountains & Musings (Guest Post)

6 comments:

  1. It was lovely when you posted it on Zanni's blog and it is still lovely now. I can't believe how quickly the past year has gone. I still remember the night you told me you were pregnant! Feels like yesterday. And now there is this living, breathing, WALKING angel who is about to turn ONE! That shit is crazy man.

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  2. You should ask mum, that would be an interesting read!!

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  3. So so true, it's gone in the blink of an eye. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and hopefully other new Mums will read this and other accounts and understand it is just a stage, they -will- sleep again, their babies won't always be constantly feeding. Lap it all up, it is such a precious time.

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  4. Yes! I love that you trusted your instincts as a mom! You have a guiding light inside of you that knows what's best for your child. And you followed it. Inspiring read.

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  5. I can't believe she's nearly one! What an adventure you've had..from creating your little family to now...everything in between is a credit to you and Dave! Congrats on surviving the first year! X

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  6. I agree it's so important to trust your instincts.... unless you get a little crazy like I did- then it's best to trust your family and friends advice ;)

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