Psychosomatic {addict insane!} | IBOT

It all started on Saturday evening when I noticed some gunk on Punky's eye. I didn't think much of it as I wiped it away. Until she woke up on Sunday with her eye practically crusted shut. A trip to the Doctor's yesterday confirmed what I'd been dreading. Conjunctivitis.

Now, every time I think about it my eyes start to water and feel itchy. When I have to clean Punky's eye or put the drops in, my eyes feel scratchy in sympathy and I'm convinced I'm going to wake up tomorrow morning with my own eyes crusted together.


I've always been a bit of a hypochondriac, and it never takes more than the mere mention of an illness for me to start suspecting that I have it too, and thinking the worst. You have a pain in your foot? Must be a stress fracture. Unexplained pain anywhere else in my body? Must be a tumour! Somebody has a cold? I'll be sniffing and coughing before I've even left their presence. Funnily enough, I do the same thing with accents.

"It's NOT a tumour" is what I have to keep telling myself. And it's always in Arnie's voice!

Since having kids it's only gotten worse. Not a week goes by when I don't get one of my sisters to check my hair for lice. All it takes is the smallest itch to have me convinced that my head is crawling with them. Never mind the fact that I have sensitive skin and I still haven't found shampoo, conditioner or hand wash that doesn't leave me with a bit of an itch. I know any head itches are just a by-product of my sensitive skin, but I've never let the truth get in the way of a good freak out!

Thankfully we have avoided nits so far, but it's only a matter of time, especially with Punky starting school next year.

I remember during the Great Gastro Weekend of September 2015, I was having tummy troubles well before I actually got gastro myself. All it took was one vomit from Zee and I was convinced I was going to throw up at any time too. It took a full 48 hours before the rest of us eventually succumbed, but I spent that 48 hours acutely aware of every single gurgle and movement my tummy made.

And now, Punky has conjunctivitis and I can't stop thinking I'm going to get it too and being paranoid about touching or rubbing my eyes. Which of course makes me need to touch or rub my eyes even more. The doctor assures me my eyes look good but still, I'm sure I'll wake up blind tomorrow from the gunk. Heaven help the tiny bit of sleep I'll have in my eyes when I wake. It will be the end of the world!

Punky's pretty cool with the whole thing to be honest. She's not happy about having to miss preschool today and swimming on Wednesday, but I've promised her we'll do something fun today while Zee is at daycare. The eye drops are a bit of a sore point, she doesn't like them, but I can't blame her, who does?!

I'm just praying that Zee doesn't get it too. I'll be spending today washing all of their clothes and sheets and pillowcases in an effort to stop it spreading to her, for no other reason than the thought of having to try and put eye drops in a Threenager's eyes terrifies me! It's hard enough with Punky, and she is old enough to understand that it has to be done to help it get better, and she knows it doesn't hurt, it's just uncomfortable.

But Zee is the most stubborn little person I've ever met! Every night we have to fight with her just to get her teeth brushed, and that's only because she doesn't like the taste of toothpaste! I can't imagine being able to get eye drops in her eyes without a lot of screaming and the help of industrial restraints & Dave's hands to assist me.

So when you rub your eyes after reading this, spare a thought for my phantom conjunctivitis and rest easy in the knowledge that you probably don't have it too. Probably.

Did you start scratching your head or rubbing your eyes while you read this? Have your kids ever had conjunctivitis? Bonus points if you can name the song my post title comes from!

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