What came first, the internet or the outrage? Linky Lovin' Friday {19th September 2014} // Blogging // Ranty McRanterson

Before I get to the linky love I'd like to start this post with a little rant if you don't mind. It's a long one, but please stick with me till the end, coz I have a couple of awesome links to warm your heart...

It's been an interesting week in my internet world. I've seen blogs written in anger and frustration that maybe should have been put on ice for a few hours rather than posted in the heat of the moment. I've seen my virtual friends judged for sharing the reality of their lives and been reminded once again why it's always, ALWAYS a good idea to pause and think twice before hitting go on your online posts.

I sometimes wonder what came first? The internet or the outrage? Everywhere you turn these days there's outrage on the net. Outrage about important things, but also outrage about really bullshit, insignificant stuff. People jumping up and down and venting their spleens. I don't know why we have an obesity epidemic with all of the jumping to conclusions and running down of others we get up to!

Did this outrage always exist? Were people always so angry and het up about so much stuff, all the time? Has this outrage always existed and it's only the development of the internet and social media that has allowed us all to vent that outrage and read about it more readily?

Or has the internet and social media turned us in to these "rage junkies"? Could we all be living somewhat ignorant, but perhaps more blissful lives if we weren't exposed to all the stuff we see online, just waiting to provoke some kind of response from us?

And have we always been so judgmental of our human fellow beings, especially ones we know nothing about except for the snippets of their life we may see online or in the playground or at work?

Don't get me wrong, I have been guilty many, many times of judging others without first considering if I have the full story or not. And it's no secret that I love a good opportunity to get my Ranty McRanterson designer ranty pants on. I try mostly to never judge a person for their opinion or the reality of their life, but I do still get judgmental sometimes (like with this guy, and for the sake of transparency, I did judge him, and then I felt sorry for him after I hit post). Sometimes things push our buttons and we are quick to hop on board the Judgetown Train, and that's when I know I need to step away from the computer.

If I get my opinion wrong I'm willing to admit that and listen to the other side. Provided they're not yelling at me. Literally or through a keyboard.

At school my favourite thing in English was debating. I loved the challenge of researching a topic and developing an argument for or against something. Coming up with a strategy to get my argument and opinion across in a way that was considered and respectful, without judging those on the opposing team or personally attacking them.

I often had to argue on the side of something that I didn't agree with. I loved it when that happened, it taught me a great deal about putting together an argument and developing an opinion that was respectful to those that differed. And more often than not, by simply looking at an issue from both sides of the coin I gained a greater understanding of the complexities of human life and learnt how to open my mind to things I'd never considered.

I discovered that it was ok to have an opinion, and to change that opinion if the facts or arguments so led me.

I've learnt that there is a way to share your opinions without serving up a side dish of judgement, ridicule and disrespect. By all means, have a different opinion to me, and voice it. If you give me your opinion without the side-serve of smokin'-hot judgement or heat-of-the-moment keyboard bashing, in a considered, mannered and respectful way, you may just find that I could end up agreeing with you. Because maybe I hadn't considered things from your point of view due to the life experiences I've had so far.

Sometimes I won't agree with you. When that happens, don't get offended, and don't start yelling or serving up more judgment. Just accept that some people won't always think exactly the way you do, agree to disagree and move on. Life would be pretty boring if we all thought the same way and had the same opinion. If I didn't talk to everyone that's ever disagreed with me I'd be living a pretty lonely life right now.

Personal attacks on the internet are just not on. Even when the subject of the disagreement is a personal one. You may live your life differently to the way someone else does, but unless you've walked a mile in their shoes and had the exact same experiences with the exact same people and family, then don't be a bitch-face. Share your thoughts, but be constructive, not judgementive (don't know if that's a word but I'm claiming it as one today).

Have a little empathy. Stop and think twice before you pass judgement on someone else. Step away from the computer, take a deep breath, go and eat some chocolate or run some kms or do whatever it is that makes you happy. Then think about the areas in your own life where you're failing, or struggling, and really admit to yourself the things that you're less-than-perfect with. Then come back and share your opinion.

And if, after all that, you still can't share your thoughts without that steaming pile of judgement, then maybe, just maybe, you're the first perfect person to have ever walked this planet and you should just piss right off, get yourself a trophy and buy yourself a fucking lottery ticket and celebrate, because you my friend have just won the jackpot of life!

To those that have felt insulted, to those that have been judged, to those that have revealed parts of themselves, shared the realities of your life with the rest of us online, and been abused or made to feel like shit because of the life you live, I say this:

It's not you, it's them. What people say to you has more to do with them than it does with you. No matter how much they may disagree or don't want to admit it, it's the truth. They may not even realise that their judgment comes from a place within themselves that makes them unhappy. I sincerely hope that one day they don't have to feel the sharp sting of the judgement they shit all over others. Know that to the people who matter, you're perfection lies in your flaws, and I sure as hell will take flawed perfection over self-righteous perfection any day!

And with that, a brain vomit which will surely one day win awards for most gratuitous use of the word judgment, I shall leave you with a few links that will restore your faith in humanity. Remind you that there are way more good people in this world than shit ones. It's just that the shit ones can type quicker than the rest of us!
Blogging Gold Rush - Going Gold for Childhood Cancer Awareness by Pin Worthy Parties
Until the 11 July 2010 I was not that aware. I knew kids got Leukemia. I knew from ads on TV. I did not really KNOW. I did not KNOW that there is more than one Leukemia. I did not KNOW there were other childhood cancers. I did not KNOW that Children suffered, and some, DIED. I did not KNOW... Until 11 July 2010 when my six month 3 week old daughter was Diagnosed with AML a type of Leukemia. I was not AWARE they gave kids, babies, Chemo. 
September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. More than 600 children a year are diagnosed with cancer in Australia. Cancer remains one of the leading causes of childhood death in the age range of 0-14 years. In a bid to raise awareness and raise vital funds for childhood cancer research, many people are supporting the Go Gold Australia for Childhood Cancer initiative. Tamara at Pin Worthy Parties is one of those people. She is encouraging bloggers and readers alike to Go Gold and help raise awareness. I'll be blogging more about this on Tuesday, and in the meantime, please check out this page here for a list of ways you can help and donate.

If you're a blogger who has an experience with childhood cancer then please consider getting on board with Tamara and help her on her mission to raise awareness among our communities.
#FUCKTOBER for Eden by BabyMac

So here’s the thing. I need your help. I need you to make October better for her because: FUCK OCTOBER EDEN. I keep saying this in messages to her. Fuck October! It’s just another date. Another month. Those days that she is dreading she has lived through them all 41 time before, she can do them again. She has already gone past the day that we ourselves will die, our parents, our loved ones, we just don’t know it yet. Thank goodness. They are just stupid dates.
We all have those dates that stick in our memories. Not because they provide us with happy thoughts, but because of the sadness and tragedy those dates were witness to. If you've never read Edenland then you best be off that way right now because you be crazy not to. Eden is an amazing writer and she puts it all on the line. And coincidentally she only just blogged the other day about people being mean. It's much more beautifully said than my rambling above.

If you do read Edenland then you know she's had a fucking rough time, the roughest, and this October is probably going to be the roughest one yet. So in a bid to help her friend, Beth is asking people to show Eden that there is still goodness and happiness in the world, that there are people who love her and care about her, even if they don't "know" her, by sending her a little slice of smile in the mail.

It doesn't get any more feel good than seeing people helping people. It warms my heart.

If you've read anything this week about people helping people, or those blogging or doing something for social good, then please, please hit me up with the links in the comments so I can do a super-feel-good Linky Lovin' Friday next week and spread a little smile of my own.


Kylie Purtell said…
Fabulous post. Love what you say about not judging others. and the links are awesome x
Kylie Purtell said…
Great post, Kylie. I guess people forget that when you rant on the internet, you're not ranting to a screen - you are possibly hurting someone's feelings out there...
Kylie Purtell said…
Thanks for sharing Kylie. Your support is greatly appreciated. I am also impressed you did some research of your own.
Kylie Purtell said…
I love this and agree with every word. I'm feeling a bit fragile at the moment and wondering why it's so hard for some people to just try to be kind and have a bit of empathy. Having Asperger's means that empathy is something I've had to work on, but if I can, why can't others? Great post. xo
Kylie Purtell said…
I think the outrage came first. I think we just hear it more because it's more concentrated online. I think people have always vented their outrage over a cup of tea in a kitchen in their own neighbourhood. I also think people are exposed to more views which clash with their own because their virtual neighbourhood is so much bigger now. So there is more to be outraged about and there are more places to have your virtual vent over your probably-not-so-virtual cup of tea (or wine).
Kylie Purtell said…
I've missed some of the outrage (though I think I know what you're talking about). I've actually posted without thinking this week - well, I thought and I still posted. I am not hugely fond of those (poor me) type blog posts and although I whinge and rant I'm usually tongue in cheek about it, but earlier this week I just let it all hang out. It felt kinda cathartic - but I still may (yet) delete the post.
Kylie Purtell said…
Such a well-written post, Kylie. People do get outraged a lot. I agree that it's essential to NEVER get personal but our pollies aren't very good role models are they?
Kylie Purtell said…
I will never understand why people feel the need to be mean on line. I really just don't get it! Sure people may push your buttons but it does not give you the right to attack them for it. Rant aside, this is still my favourite Friday read xx
Kylie Purtell said…
Great post Kylie! I missed the outrage this week but I do agree with what you say. I think people have always vented and ranted but it used to be to far fewer people!
Kylie Purtell said…
I think that people have always been judgemental, it's in our human nature to be. I do think though that the internet has moved it from between a few friends over drinks to the world wide web. The thing that I find crazy though is that people judge other people for what they are outraged about, like it's not possible to be outraged about the 'big' stuff and the everyday stuff all at the same time.
Kylie Purtell said…
I love this Kylie, and totally agree. I have read a few things this week, that quite frankly, have pissed me right off. But you are right, it says more about them than it does about any one else, and in the end I just feel sorry for people who thrive on such negativity.
Kylie Purtell said…
This is great Kylie, people are always going to be judgemental of others and disagree with differing opinions. Sometimes that's what makes it interesting! But you can disagree and not be rude or condescending about it, there is a right way and a wrong wrong way to vent, after all it just wouldn't be fun if we all thought the same.
Kylie Purtell said…
Yewwwww! Love this. I mouthed of this week at something which was so unlike me Mrs Sit on the Fence and immediately I felt stupid for doing it. I cannot stand keyboard warriers and people who just bluntly sya stuff without thinking of the person at the other end. I see it so often on Facebook and whilst I want to call them out and stamp my feet, I usually dont, because I'm a wuss and I hate upsetting the apple cart. Good on you for calling it chick and fist Bump to Beth for her gorgeous call out she did for Eden this week. THAT made me smile xx
Kylie Purtell said…
I just think everyone should stop caring about other people's business so much. If you don't like what other people blog about just don't read it. Personal attacks are never right and can never help the attacker's cause. All that time spent wringing hands and gnashing teeth judging other people really just screws up the judger's head. Crazy.
Kylie Purtell said…
Talkback radio has been around a lot longer than (anti)social media.
Kylie Purtell said…
It's like that meme, "I used to wish I could read minds. Then I got a Facebook account and I'm over it." So many opinions - and spelt badly!! I very, very rarely enter into the fray - no matter how annoyed people make me.
Kylie Purtell said…
You know what I think it is? In our offscreen lives, we hang with people we like and who we mostly agree with. Online we are exposed to all these different people with different points of view and it's like we become three again and just get all cranky about it. When really we just have to grow up a bit.

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