The Keepin' it Real Files - March 2014

I am a firm believer in keeping it real. Whether it be online or offline, I try to be as honest as I can about my life. I don't see the point in airbushing things (unless of course you're talking about a giant pimple on my chin, I'd probably airbrush that. But only if it was in a picture I intended on hanging on my wall. Nobody wants to see that shiz!).

I also hate the distinction IRL or In Real Life. Everything is real life. What we post online, what we do offline. Online stuff is not fake, or magical or make believe. Not to me anyway. It's all just my life. The only distinction is some of it is lived on the internet and some of it is not. It's all real. And I think more people need to remember that.

Maybe people might start to think twice before they post some of the shit they do online, if they treated their interactions online in the same way they treat their interactions offline. The way the world is today, we can't afford for people to still be thinking that their online life isn't "real life" and the usual rules of common society don't apply when hangin' out online.

But I digress.
I was going to add arrows pointing to all the mess but I would have had to include so many that they would cover all the mess. Just ignore the cute kids and look in the background of the pics and you'll get an idea of the mess I'm talking about.



Isn't it funny how sometimes you can read one thing and then suddenly you seem to read 2 or 3 other things along the same lines or theme? That happened to me lately on the issue of creatively cropping pictures before posting online or via Instagram. People cleaning and tidying things before taking pictures.

Or using the cropping tools of photo apps to cut out crap and junk and make it seem like their houses and lives weren't as messy as what they really were.

I have to tell you, I don't understand this. Why? What are people afraid of? Are they afraid of being labelled as lazy? Or dirty? Or afraid of people thinking they have no pride in themselves or their homes? I don't see the point in lying or stretching the truth, and trying to be something I'm not. This is me, this is my life. What you see is what you get.

Most of the photos I post to Instagram are filled with crap! And that is for two reasons.

Number 1. I'm lazy as shit. Yep, that's right, I'll own it. I'm lazy. I don't spend my days tidying my house and putting things away and making sure it's "people-ready" at all times. I just can't be bothered. We live in a near-constant state of CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome). The only reason why I tidy my house when I have people coming over is to make room for them!
I live by this mantra! Although I must admit, this is getting to the top end of messiness and it has actually been cleared a bit since this photo was taken, I needed space to put my notebook and textbook while doing Tafe stuff!

Don't get me wrong, my house isn't dirty. I clean and vacuum and wash the floors and do the dishes (ok, my dishwasher does those) and the laundry (ok, so Dave does most of that!). In fact some days I feel like all I ever do is clean and tidy up after small people. However what I don't do is iron, I hardly ever fold the laundry, I only put away all the kids toys once a day, and I don't make more washing for myself than is necessary.

Shock, horror, but my girls sometimes wear the same clothes 2 days in a row. In fact so do I! If we are having a few home-days, where we don't have to go anywhere, I don't see the point in putting clean clothes on the baby just to sit around the house. She's 7 months old and she can't crawl. She hardly gets dirty. I put a bib on her at meal times or take her clothes off her, and they are good to go for another day, most of the time.

The toddler is a little different, it's almost impossible for a 2 year old to consume a meal without wearing it most of the time, but that's half the fun of being 2! You've got a licence to make mess. So I take her shirt off when she is eating and put it back on after she's been cleaned up. And if by some miracle her shirt remains mostly clean, with only a spot or two of vegemite on it, then I consider it clean enough to wear around the house the next day.

In fact I consider it crazy to put a clean shirt on her the next day, when she is just gonna dirty up that one too. I'm not dressing her in filthy rags, don't get me wrong. But everything within reason, a couple of vegemite spots, pen marks or spots of whatever cream/substance she's nicked off with and smeared on the walls that day, is not enough to warrant wearing a new shirt to just be hanging around the house in.

If it's been a hot day, where I sweat loads, or I've gotten particularly dirty for one reason or another, I'll wear a clean shirt the next day. Or if I'm going out. But if we are just hanging out at home for the day then I'll wear the shirt and bottoms I had on the day before. Simple as that. I work on the same theory for coffee cups. Why use half a dozen cups when you can just give the one you're using a rinse out and make your next cup of tea or coffee in it? Saves some space in the dishwasher at any rate!

For some people, the thought of living in a messy house does their head in. They can't do it. And that's cool. If you have to live in a house that's always tidy, more power to ya. I know people like this and I have respect for the way they manage to keep their houses mess and clutter-free. It's just not something I prioritise. To do all the things I wanna do (blog, read, study, play with the girls, hang out with Dave, watch TV, go out with friends) I have to make a few sacrifices and let some things go, and worrying about mess is something I choose not to do.

If I worried about it I would go insane. Because A) for me, the reality is that I'm not the sort of person who is able to keep their house tidy 24/7, small children or no; and B) if I can't make time to do the things I love and wanna do then I am not a nice person, I'm not a happy person. And when Mummy's not happy, ain't nobody happy! So I do what I gotta do to make it all work, without us actually living in squalor, either!

And now I've forgotten what reason number 2 was! Probably along the same lines as being lazy, I'm too lazy to spend my time creatively cropping mess out of photos. Who could be bothered?! I'd rather spend any time I do playing with filters so mess looks arty as well as messy!

I'm sure I'm not alone in this. I can't be the only person who keeps their clean washing in a pile on a lounge in the corner of the dining room, or uses half of their dining table as a dumping ground half of the time? Surely not everyone we interact with online via blogs and social media have these immaculate houses with no mess or clutter anywhere, and beautiful, whimsical, inspiring posters all over the place with glowing white walls and glistening floors. Right?
What my house often looks like at the end of the day, especially on a night shift night when I've done the whole evening routine by myself and can't be bothered to do anything but flake on the couch. The mess will still be there tomorrow!

I would love to see what other bloggers houses really look like at the end of the day. Because I'm betting they're not all immaculate all of the time. And I'd love to see that!

So let's keep it real, are you honest about your life when you're hanging out online? Do you agree that there shouldn't really be this distinction of online and "real life"? 

What things do you "let go" or prioritise over others to make a happy life? Are you a tidy person or a messy person like me? 

And if you are one of those people with the glowing white walls, immaculate living spaces and inspiring posters on the walls, can you come do the same to my house? (Ah, who am I kidding, what would be the point, it would only last a day or two anyway!)

Linking up with Jess coz it's Tuesday and IBOT!
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Comments

Kylie Purtell said…
I posted a photo of myself the other day complete with the dumping ground that used to be my table. I've posted pictures of the state of my lounge room, and it looks like that 90% of the time. Also Dyllan is naked most of the time when we are home, seriously cannot get that kid to keep his clothes on once we get home. Yet I still seem to have a pile of washing!
I sometimes make the distinction between in real life and online life, but more when I am talking about people I have met. Like..I know this person in real life, as a face to face person, not just in my computer screen. In saying that though, a lot of the people that I have met online I consider friends and call them so when interacting. Or if I am telling Paul about my day.
Kylie Purtell said…
Generally we don't sit on the couch because there is clean washing on there. I wishing it wasn't stupid o'clock and dark so I could take some photos of the disaster zone that is my house. I loved this post, probably because it applies to me on so many levels.
Kylie Purtell said…
I'm messy but my partner is a neat freak. I wait til the end of the day then tidy before he arrives home (what's the point of doing it all day long???)
Kylie Purtell said…
I can't get over how much Punky looks like this actress!! http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0447695/
Kylie Purtell said…
I don't like things too chaotic, but I don't spend a lot of time tidying either...just pick up as we go to maintain a little semblance of order. But I am a firm believer in making memories and fun, rather than fussing too much about order. x
Kylie Purtell said…
I prefer a tidy home. But I don't have it. As long as stuff is in neat piles or behind cupboard doors I feel good and sane. if it's in a jumble I feel like I am in a jumble too. So I guess I am an in-betweeny. Perhaps mine is a more "structured" mess? (beware ... don't open my cupboard doors as things may cave in on you ... the illusion of being clean and tidy does not necessarily mean that I am).
Kylie Purtell said…
This is what I do too Lydia!
Kylie Purtell said…
I love your honesty! I am still trying to keep up the facade that I have a tidy home IRL and online! A clean house is a sign of a wasted life! That is probably because I value other things more!
Kylie Purtell said…
We just had a mad cleaning session on Sunday. We are both pretty messy people and it can really get out of hand sometimes ;p Decluttering every now and then is very soothing to the soul.. to just throw away or the mess and rubbish we don't need in our lives!

Ai @ Sakura Haruka
Kylie Purtell said…
The only reason I'd crop out something out of photo would be if it was a willy or bum!! Mess is mess and quite frankly right now the outside of my house looks like a tornado just hit - in fact I'm going to take a photo and IG it for you RIGHT NOW - here I go - ready..... xxx
Kylie Purtell said…
We have a while couch dedicated to washing too! The only washing I out away is the girls stuff, coz there is so much of it an if I don't then Punky eventually starts playing with it and then I can't tell what's clean and what's dirty! Our clothes never get out away, there's no point unless we need the lounge space for visitors, and even then I usually dump it on our bed and bring it back out when they are gone! lol!
Kylie Purtell said…
Great post Kylie, I wrote a post about this awhile ago too after I found myself cropping 'life' out of a photo I was sending to a friend. I am soooo glad to hear there is someone else who has a clean laundry pile too, if ours manages to move from the laundry bench, it stays piled in a basket in our bedroom! I am also with you re: wearing the same clothes - if it's clean they can wear it again. This is getting harder with our baby boy since he is now commando crawling and picks up everything on the floor as he slides along it.
I am one of those people who doesn't like clutter, but with two little boys the reality is we always have 'stuff' strewn everywhere. Currently my toddler is 'swimming' through a sea of toys on the floor - will post an IG pic just for you!
Kylie Purtell said…
I have to say...I like things tidy. I physically can't function in complete mess. You will find me cranky, unable to find stuff and incoherent amongst all the swear words. I only tidy Tom's toys once a day, but we do it together at the end of the day and he has baskets for certain things - cars here, farm animals there etc. I find it therapeutic to end the day on a somewhat clean note. So while you admire those neat freaks, l say hey, I'd love to be able to function in mess and have more time to do the other stuff!
Kylie Purtell said…
When Bell was little, it was a sea of toys in our house! I would clear things away at the end of the day, and couldn't understand people who were constantly tidying. Now that she's older, it's canvases, paints and crafty stuff all over the place. I think we just go from one phase to the next.
And the end of our kitchen bench is the dumping ground that I'm constantly trying to keep under control. Don't think I'll ever win that battle!
Kylie Purtell said…
I just posted today about how I am trying to organise my kids room this month and I posted photos of the mess.. Feel free to pop on over and check out my "REAL LIFE"
I love organising so I really do TRY to keep a neat house, but of course it doesn't happen. My loungeroom currently has a laundry basket full of clean laundry, my coffee table is covered in my camera, tupperware orders, a random nerf bullet and an iPod charger. You are definitely not alone!
Visiting from #IBOT
Kylie Purtell said…
Am guilty of cropping photos. But agree with you that online is real life. Whilst I have a high tolerance for mess, my husband does not, so if we have anyone over, the house needs to be clean. Out of respect to him, I don't post photos of the mess.
Kylie Purtell said…
I clean up downstairs where we spend most of our time, but upstairs is out of sight out of mind. I only properly clean if people are coming over. Theres toys and shit everywhere here!
Kylie Purtell said…
Oh I love you Kylie!!! So much!! I'm all for being real all the time *but yes get rid of the zit for the wall pic) I try to be tidy, I really do, but it doesn't come natural, and I refuse to do it at the expense of all else. That's not living.
Plus I don't need to have a perfect house that looks amazing. All I want, is for people to come over and feel comfortable and enjoy each others company. That's what matters to me.
Kylie Purtell said…
Since having children, my standards have dropped a lot. My husband sometimes walks in the door and sees toys everywhere and the place looks like a bomb hit it, but once the girls are in bed, we tidy it all together because I can't sit on the lounge and watch tv with the mess.
Kylie Purtell said…
Love this post. I dislike how perfect everyone's home seem when they post on social media. I would prefer a tidy home, if someone else was following my three and picking up after them constantly.
I also think you're onto something in relation to the whole 'in real life' thing, if that distinction could be removed I think so many online interactions could be much better!
Kylie Purtell said…
I see your pile of clean laundry and raise you my dining room covered in both clean and dirty laundry.
Interesting thoughts on IRL. Everything is absolutely real life, I totally agree with you. But I guess sometimes people tend to use the internet more for a distorted perception of things. Sad but true.
Kylie Purtell said…
I have to admit that I am an anal retentive neat freak - I can cope with anyones elses mess but my own and a tidy house makes me feel like there is at least one part of my life I am in control of. That being said - my kids toy room resembles a chinese laundry and we basically live out of mounds of unfolded clothes because that is one thing I cannot control!

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